December 24, 2024
My dearest Willy/Williamson/William/Big W,
Every Asian family needs their token crusty white dog. Today I found out that you are going to be put down in mid January before my parents (our parents?) go to the Philippines for 6 weeks. When I left in July, I knew that was likely to be the last time I would see you given that you are a 19 year old dog. But of course, in the back of my mind, I was selfishly hoping you would stick around until I visit home in October. Deep down, I knew that was probably impossible. Don’t go, I want you to stay, selfishly, it’s my own comfort I’m trying to hold on to.
I remember Christmas of 2022, I was at home and brought the snow from Montreal with me. When we were kids, you loved to trot and jump around in the rare snow that the Sunshine Coast gets. This year though, your legs weren’t as spry as before, so (our) dad dug a walkway for you to use as you did your business. That morning, Serene sat on the couch upstairs, and the winter sun was shining bright on us as I sat on the steps watching you skip around the yard in that sideways canter that you do. The North Shore mountains sparkled behind you, and I took a mental image in my head. A moment I can’t ever forget. Watching my old tiny white crusty dog enjoy the winter’s blanket again. How things never change. But even when they do, there’s always going to be something or someone familiar. For 19 years you were that for me. Always changing together, growing a little bit older and wiser, but still the puppy and child at heart together. I remember the day you came home to us with your long hair and chipper attitude, I remember the days we spent at the beach together when I let you roam free and you avoided the ocean but always out ran me when I tried to tether you back in. I remember all the bad haircuts we both had over the years but that it always grew back. I remember when you bit me when I was 7 or 8 because I was being annoying and taunting you by getting too close in your face, and I know I deserved that.
So although I’m across the world, and I can’t bring you to the beach one more time, and I can’t sneakily feed you from the table when I’m not supposed to, and I can’t fill your water dish with Brita-filtered water while my dad rolls his eyes in the background, I do know that I can make my parents (our parents?) a list of what to do to say farewell to my long time best friend, the one who I share a room with, the one who watched me grow and change and never said a word about it but always knew it was bedtime when my head band went on and the lamp turned off.
So as I wish you farewell Willy, I leave myself this list to remember what we did together when times were good, bad, ugly and everything in between. Because if one thing is for sure, you were a loving constant for me these past 19 years together.
- An expensive piece of steak with the fat cut off and cut up small
- One last walk at Smith beach
- A warm bath in the kitchen sink followed by letting you run around damp in the house
- Putting your bed on the couch so that you can be comfortable as we hang out, watch TV, and doze off into sleep together
- A big pile of wet food
- One last visit from your best babysitter Humi
- A victory lap around the back yard
They say all dogs go to heaven but for me you were a tiny slice of that every time I came home. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BIG W!!!!!!
Third times a charm! 